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My Real love Story
I'm Jaci Rae which is my real love story. Initially when i first began "serious" dating, everybody was supposed to be "the one." At least that is what everyone told me. "He's the one for you personally." "When have you been two going to get married?" "Has he popped the question yet?" What many people never saw was the inner turmoil of the relationship and exactly how the person treated me behind the scenes. Society sees single people as sad and alone, yet whenever I was in a relationship, I was deeply lonely. However, the underlying current of feeling lonely after i is at a relationship was much less after i was single, only now I had the added value of feeling rejected, too. Why? How could I be lonely when I had "the one" sitting alongside me; and just how, when I was single and alone, could Personally i think less lonely than after i was with "the one"? Other questions constantly raced through my thoughts such as: Was I usually the incorrect person? Why wasn't I ever Mrs. Right? To provide you with more insight into me and how I wound up in a string of washout relationships with men that broke my heart and my banking account many times, you need a little understanding about my background. I was raised poor using the added feeling of being very unwanted. I grew up in a home that wasn't a home,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], filled with drug addicts and sexual predators; and that i was the child with a key around my neck. My Mom wasn't home much because she'd to operate to support two children as a single mother without child support,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and so i grew up feeling very rejected and alone. Would you see the pattern? Don't blame my Mom for which happened in my experience. If it hadn't been this way,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], I wouldn't have become up to be who I'm today. My brother succumbed to the drug life through the chronilogical age of seven and that i said no. There but for the Grace of God go I, really. I knew growing up my older brother seeking me out for help and guidance, and calling me Mom most of the time. His escape in a very early age was drugs and alcohol and mine was food. Either I did not eat at all,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], acting out my anorexia,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], or I ate ravenously, something I still struggle with today. Food was the only thing I could control in my own life and exactly how I learned to punish myself for being so "bad." Why did I believe I was bad? My reasoning as a child was if I were a good girl,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], no one would harm me. Therefore, I must be very bad and that i had been punished to be so. By the chronilogical age of eight, I began on a journey to discover why these men sought to harm me and why I was so ugly, stupid, fat and horrible. I ravenously read every book I could find in the school library during lunch and magazines in your own home. After i was older and had employment (age 12), I bought books and music, even though I desired clothing and food more. It started me on the journey that hasn't stopped; my love of why is people tick and just how relationships work or don't. Let's move to events that are more recent. With all my education and studying, I still wound up in the "wrong" relationship. Why? I'd changed my pattern, approximately I figured. I picked people with different backgrounds,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], different careers, different education levels,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], different socio-economic backgrounds and different looks. What was wrong? I always seemed to pick the man who would treat me the worst. The "good" ones only wanted to be my buddies. During that time, I was sought after by family and friends and those that were known me to assist them to understand themselves as well as their relationships. Why was I in a position to help them and never myself? I knew the fundamental rule that I must love myself before anyone else want me, but I knew which i could never love myself. I had been too ugly. Too fat. Too stupid. In addition to any other horrible adjectives I possibly could throw at myself. So I hid myself even further. The laws of attraction that most of us have heard, but practically nobody adheres too, ruled over me. I only attracted the ones that would hurt me the most because I spent the majority of my free time hurting myself mentally with words and physically with food. I hadn't changed the way I felt about myself, so how could I expect the men in my life to change how they treated me? One day, while I was sitting with my then-boyfriend, the truth came over me. The words I'd read about, studied and preached to others hit me full in the face. I deserve better and I am not junk. This man, who had been a dear friend for years, was my boyfriend now and that he was horrible to me! He was a great friend but sucked at the boyfriend gig. When i sat within the room having a couple of NFL people, I realized many of these women and men required to score points with themselves and their "loved" ones and not simply put a show on so others thought they did. That's when the title, "Winning Points Using the Woman in Your Life One Touchdown at a Time -- How to Score for Men and Women" came to my thoughts. At first I fought writing this book. How could I possibly mix football and love? I wasn't a huge football fan! However, once I sat right down to achieve this it came out quickly (I learned a lot about football on the way!). The next step I took to write the book was to interview men and women in the pub to find out what their thoughts were about relationships and what made them crazy in them. A year . 5 of research later I began the real journey of self-discovery. I wasn't the horrible,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], awful, ugly person I believed deep during my soul I had been. I had been a kind individual who struggled together with her weight, but that didn't mean I didn't deserve the very best. It had been also at that point which i realized I had been much happier being single than being in a relationship, and I began to practice the self-love I usually spoke and wrote about. For two years I wrote and I was happy - elated actually. People would stop me on the street just to say just how much I glowed. It was amazing. They are saying love comes when you least expect it, and that's what happened to me. It had been within my duration of happy singleness that I met the person who does turn out to be my soul mate. We talked for hours and that i mean truly talked. I had never really had such in-depth conversation with anyone! Nevertheless, I ran scared. Per month later I had been in a relationship with a man who was fun but a person. After a month with him, I realized things i was doing and headed as quickly as I possibly could within the other way. I called up the other man and we continued our first date. He was kind and sensitive (gorgeous as well), and that he even sidestepped me from doggy poop on our hike. We spent the whole afternoon and well into the wee hours from the next morning just talking and laughing. However, when I left him for my car I knew I wasn't likely to date him. My mom called me the next day and asked me the way the date had gone. I informed her such a wonderful time I'd and just how wonderful he was. For the reason that instance I designed a choice (and you can too) to change my dating pattern. I had been likely to go for the person I wasn't attracted too. The person who did not have the component of "danger," that is what seemed to be underlying in all the other men I had dated. That was nearly two years ago, and I am still totally in love as he is with me. We literally spend the majority of our time together (we work alongside too); even though we now have occasional disagreements,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], we always apologize. We are an ordinary couple in the end! He really is the most incredible man I've ever known. What exactly changed and just how can you change your life so you can attract the one person that will treat you like gold? Time passes over that a lot in Winning Points With the Woman in Your Life One Touchdown at a Time (Simon and Schuster -- Fireside). Despite the title, this book is perfect for both sexes and is not about
Jaci Rae's humble beginnings and formal training have taught her the value of relationships and how to result in the honeymoon sustain. When she isn't dishing relationship advice online on some of the top ranked relationship / internet dating sites, Rae conducts seminars and teaches at places like The Learning Annex and Holland Cruise Lines.
Jaci Rae's No. 1 best-seller is, Winning Points Using the Woman in Your Life One Touchdown at a Time (Simon and Schuster). To learn more Win in Love, Romance and Dating Check out Jaci Rae Tour to find out more about how you can listen to Jaci live.
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